I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
