What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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