I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
