whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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