Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Randomize
