so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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