I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
