He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
