I wish I could punch you in the face.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
