I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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