I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize