let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
