New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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