I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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