come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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