You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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