Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?

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(201): so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA? http://tfl.nu/qz9z

Replies (23) Good night (4919) Bad night (1543)
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(214): View more from Texas

My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.

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(214): My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes. http://tfl.nu/jl4m

Replies (72) Good night (6591) Bad night (1491)
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(217): View more from Illinois

So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy

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(217): So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy http://tfl.nu/9pzn

Replies (16) Good night (966) Bad night (4530)
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(219): View more from Indiana

My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?

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(219): My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout? http://tfl.nu/0knj

Replies (24) Good night (5814) Bad night (2436)
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(256): View more from Alabama

Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.

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(256): Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs. http://tfl.nu/y8sy

Replies (23) Good night (2325) Bad night (4591)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis

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(414): I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis http://tfl.nu/ml6e

Replies (6) Good night (969) Bad night (3217)
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(585): View more from New York

with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible

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(585): with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible http://tfl.nu/x1el

Replies (8) Good night (4131) Bad night (1478)
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(708): View more from Illinois

So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?

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(708): So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS? http://tfl.nu/0qn8

Replies (25) Good night (1919) Bad night (4254)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.

(917): View more from New York City

what ever happened to our old dealer?

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(973): I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day. (917): what ever happened to our old dealer? http://tfl.nu/28sz

Replies (1) Good night (2409) Bad night (924)
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(360): View more from Washington

if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked

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(360): if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked http://tfl.nu/kcmn

Replies (24) Good night (5209) Bad night (2025)
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(214): View more from Texas

He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.

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(214): He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash. http://tfl.nu/jj6x

Replies (7) Good night (1952) Bad night (814)
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(540): View more from Virginia

Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.

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(540): Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat. http://tfl.nu/hg85

Replies (4) Good night (2055) Bad night (562)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.

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(780): After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard. http://tfl.nu/ug22

Replies (7) Good night (1625) Bad night (547)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.

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(615): Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast. http://tfl.nu/ki2v

Replies (2) Good night (644) Bad night (240)
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(417): View more from Missouri

I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...

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(417): I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him... http://tfl.nu/ae62

Replies (2) Good night (264) Bad night (724)

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