she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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