it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
