oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
