okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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