I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
