On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
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