She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
