A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
