wake up i wanna do it froggy style
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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