Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
