the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
