let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
