i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize