READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
