Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"

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(732): View more from New Jersey

i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.

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(207): View more from Maine

I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(916): View more from California

Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.

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(773): View more from Illinois

I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober

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(613): View more from Ontario

Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?

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