I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
