thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Sober January is a disaster.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize
