imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
