Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
