My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
We left the knife in your bed.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
