and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
