Dual....:-)
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
