): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
