i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
