No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
