Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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