If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
