Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
