i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
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