I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
