well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
