the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize