hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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