Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
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