Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
